Perubahan = keharusan or pilihan?

Bloggers, sebenarnya menurut kalian apa perubahan (tentunya menjadi orang-orang yg lebih baik) itu suatu keharusan apa pilihan?
Gini deh ya, kalo itu cuma pilihan berarti kita diperhadapkan dengan kata-kata IYA apa NGGAK. A choice you have to make. You’ve got to decide. Not all people would know where to go from Yes, I wanna change to be a better me. Not all would know what to do after that. That is in the case for people who wish themselves want to change.

Some might just ignore that completely dan berkata nggak. Aku nyaman dengan keadaanku sekarang, aku nggak perlu merubah apa-apa. Aku nggak perlu berubah. I’m all good with who I am now.

Inilah keadaan yg sering kali memenjarakan kita sehingga pintu perubahan terlihat susah kita capai. Sebenarnya begini. Perubahan bukanlah suatu pilihan, melainkan keharusan.

Think about it. Karena government nggak berubah, ekonomi merosot, rakyat jadi miskin, nggak terurus. Apa sih sebenarnya alasannya? Ya itu dia. Nggak mau berubah menjadi yg lebih baik. Terlalu mengedepankan comfort zone; di mana mereka nyaman, di situ mereka ada.

Tapi bloggers, dunia kita nggak akan selalu penuh bunga. Terkadang kita diperhadapkan dengan hal-hal yg butuh keputusanmu. Nggak bisa ngambang saja. Di sinilah kita diajar Tuhan untuk leap out of our comfort zone. Berani berubah berarti berani berkorban.

Di saat-saat banyak masalahlah muncul kemauan kita (yg sebenarnya ada, tinggal kita mau denger apa nggak) untuk berubah.

Apapun yg telah terjadi, biarkanlah itu menjadi pelajaran buat di masa depan supaya nggak melakukan kesalahan berulang-ulang kali. Kita akan tau segala kelemahan kita jika kita mau berubah.

Tanpa perubahan tidak ada TEROBOSAN.

Benar sekali, teman-teman!

Sekarang jika kalian sedang diperhadapkan dengan suatu masalah or tantangan or situasi-situasi dimana kalian harus menetapkan suatu keputusan pribadi kalian… Ingatlah, perubahan bukan suatu pilihan, tapi Tuhan menginginkan kita untuk berubah menjadi anak-anakNYA yg lebih baik, lebih setia. Ini suatu keharusan. Sekarang kita semua ingin belajar untuk membuang sedikit demi sedikit kebiasaan-kebiasaan buruk kita, hal-hal yg nggak baik dilakukan dan nggak pantas dilakukan sebagai anak Tuhan seperti berbohong, mencuri, fitnah dsb. Ingat… Tuhan hanya bisa dihampiri dengan kekudusan. Tanpa kekudusan, kamu nggak bisa ketemu muka dengan muka dengan Yesus. Jaga kekudusan hatimu whatever happens! Lastly temans, bangkit bagi Tuhan! Jangan terbawa suasana sedihmu terus.

A bird can fly over you but don’t let it nest on your head. The feeling of broken hearted will always be there for as long as you let it stay. Sooner or later, you’ll have to let it go. You can’t hold a butterfly in a closed fist without crushing its fragile wings. You can only extend a finger and let it settle down if it so chooses. The same is true of the people you love. Clinging too tightly weakens them and keeps them from becoming all GOD intends for them. Give them room to stretch and grow. Let them explore their own world first. They will gladly fly back into your arm before you know it!

Jangan ragu, jangan gentar, pantang mundur! Bagi orang yg percaya, pasti akan ada jalan keluar.

RAGU MEMILIH? Jawabannya hanya ada pada satu Pribadi. Datanglah pada Yesus!

Rasa Bersalah Menghantuimu?

Bukanlah jarang, kita masih menemukan diri kita masing-masing terhimpit oleh kata-kata seperti berikut, “Wah, seandainya saja… Saya nggak seperti itu di waktu lalu, pasti kejadiannya akan lain ya…”

Teman-teman, wake up! Hal yang wajar kalau memang terkadang kita masih diikuti perasaan bersalah kita akan masa lalu. Mungkin merasa tidak nyaman, tidak puas dengan apa yang telah kita perbuat. Tapi, pertanyaan yang mungkin bisa “membangunkanmu”; kapan kamu mau keluar dari rasa bersalah yang berlarut-larut? Kapan kamu mau menyelesaikannya?

Contoh yang gampang tuk bloggers mengerti mungkin ini… “Seandainya kemarin aku belajar, pasti akan dapat nilai bagus dan lulus ujian! Tapi sekarang aku harus mengulangi satu tingkat lagi. Jadi males!”

Bloggers, inilah waktunya kita semua belajar dari kesalahan-kesalahan di masa lalu untuk tidak mengulang lagi buat masa depan kita. Masih ada masa depan yang cerah kelak menghampirimu, siapkanlah dirimu dari sekarang untuk bisa siap dengan perubahan-perubahan itu! Jadi nggak kaget!

Tuhan sudah mengampuni kesalahan Anda, sekarang waktumu untuk mengampuni dirimu sendiri. Jangan terpaku dengan apa yang telah terjadi, tapi fokuskan dirimu dengan apa yang akan terjadi. Hadapilah kenyataan, kalau memang itu yang telah terjadi terhadap kita (walaupun pahit sekalipun), terimalah dan bersyukurlah senantiasa. Pastilah kamu akan mengerti, bahwa rencana Tuhan nggak ada yang buat kamu celaka karena Bapa sangat mengasihimu.

Berdoalah, minta pertolonganNya supaya Dia bisa melepaskanmu dari jerat perasaan bersalahmu! Ini saatnya kamu berhenti menoleh ke belakang! Masih banyak yang kamu bisa lakukan buat orang-orang di sekitarmu. Selesaikan semua denganNya, maka Dia akan memberi kelegaan yang sebelumnya tak pernah kamu rasakan.

Beri sedikit usaha, pasti Tuhan menjawab! Bloggers, apa kalian siap membuang segala perasaan yang selama ini kamu pendam di dalam hatimu? Rasa bersalah itu? Nggak bagus kalau dipendam terus, nanti bisa sakit… So, do it now. Nothing’s ever too late for God… Masa depanmu menunggumu!

With love and blessings,

Patricia

Love as I knew it…

In these couple of weeks, I’ve learned lots of valuable lessons. Not only did they enable me to “grow up” mentally, but also to surrender even things don’t go as we planned them to be. Yeah, lots of efforts went into it. But, I’ve taught myself to be strong even in the hardest conditions.

I know I’m sick of this ovarian cysts thing. Yet, I know I’m still able to do so many things through God who strengthens me, said Philippians.

That’s that. I will try to get back to the roll of life as soon as I get my grip back on my healthy life.

This week, I’ve also been “left alone” by my sweetest person that I’ve ever found. Not looking at the reasons, I’m still thankful that he would still be my brother. It had been really hard on me, he was my other half. My everyday of my life. It really seemed to me couple of days ago that the sun won’t shine again on me, if he’s not there anymore to hold back my tears. I loved him so much, yet I can’t find any words to compete against his will to break up. I don’t want to hold back his feeling, so I just followed. I know I’ve done so many wrongs in the past and I’ve said sorry a thousand times but it seemed he won’t even reply to it. Well, for how long? God knows. It torn me apart yet I could still smile to those beloved people around me. I tried to hide it yet it still seemed to show.

But now, I’ve changed. I tend not to look for whatever I’ve done wrong to him, but to fix them. No humans can grow perfect without mistakes. I’m not scared anymore to face my future, for one night God talked to me personally to rest in Him. To trust my problems to be solved by Him. Even though I may not know what He’s doing right now, I know one thing… God always loves us. For whoever we are and whatever we do. Think about it; you could still breathe this second! That’s His awesome grace! There are so many blessings we cannot see. All will be done good in His own time. We may not understand what’s happening to us now, but just BELIEVE at the end… It will be a jolly good thing for us.

Now, I’m free. Not only mentally and physically but also SPIRITUALLY. Thanks for giving me the time to myself to think about what I had done to you, brother. I wish you the best of the best. I’ve always loved you all along, if you think this is the right way for both of us, then let it be. You know exactly how hard this time of the year is for me; with all my sickness and you leaving me. And yet, I know and believe God will never rest in me. He will always do great jobs for both of us. He will strengthen us and keep serving the Lord.

For love is not found when you told the person you loved them, but love can be found when you can still see what’s ahead of you after you let go of the person that meant the most for you.

For love can be found deep down in you, and believe me my friend… When you let go, someday something or someone is going to come back to you with a better reason to love you. To know you, to be with you; for better or for worse. And that time I can cherish for this had happened to me. To teach me a lesson; that there will always be hope behind everything.

I hope you find the best to suit you and your personalities and thank you for bringing the best of you for me. You’ve taught me to surrender; to let go. My brethren, this is love as I knew it… Even at the hardest time, swing back and relax! God will never let you fall. He will catch you with His abundant grace and His awesome love, this is time to let go…

Loyalty

Interesting. Loyalty. What does it really mean?

For me; the feeling of bondage that makes us stick to whatever our choice had been, through thick and thin. A bondage that makes us fond of one another. A bondage that makes us “stick” to someone devoted to the loyalty promise we had made, itself.

It’s silly it seemed how much I’ve cried in the past days. It’s just a bother for me to think that somebody would really not care about me anymore. Well, anyhow. Maybe it’s my cross I have to bear. Everyone has their own difficulties, and maybe this is just the start of mine.

I thought again. Maybe I’m not supposed to leave him alone. And maybe, just maybe, I would just have to wait a little longer. Even though it seems to hurt. A lot. I just hope that I would have the ability to do so. To remain constant in my feelings. None is forever calm. Yeah, yeah I know that. But, deep inside. Man, it sliced!

Or maybe he’s just too busy to text me. That doesn’t mean he’s not loyal to me, isn’t it? Thus, I don’t wanna judge too quick, too eager. No. I might make the same mistake. And way, I don’t want it. Seriously, no.

Wait, maybe he’s also spending time with his family. And he’s too busy to come around in thoughts with me. But, isn’t it so mean of him not to let me know he cares?

Loyalty loyalty. Tell me what to do next?

Must I stay calm and remain constant with this feeling of burden that I’ve been carrying for over a week? Or must I leave him behind? Well, the last one’s surely not LOYAL. I really want to be the dog like this child over here. He’s always there when the child needs love and affection. I really want to keep my promises true. But, long distance isn’t making critical moments like this much easier. Instead, more difficult.

www.dictionary.com says LOYALTY: the state or quality of being loyal; faithfulness to commitments or obligations.

I really don’t know what to do, except to bring all in prayers. Yes, to that promise or commitments I must stand with. I have to know that LOVE CONQUERS ALL.

Faithfulness to commitments. And yes, we have made our commitments to stay true to each other (be loyal) and yeah I will keep holding on to it. For how long? God knows.

The Worst Day of My Life

Well, practically this kinda thing had happened more than once. And I’ve never loved it, always hated it. Same here. Today is, in fact, the worst day of my life. Salt, pepper, acid, lemon, orange, strawberry, grapes, cuckoo. Well, that’s how mixed up I feel now. Let’s face it, knowing your exam results that are NOT as good as you expected them to be, might not be on your top list of favourite situations. There had been worse cases, but today I cried. Again. Yes, I know. Very childish, indeed. But, I feel so down in school when I saw a “C” in my Business Studies paper. I mean, I studied my butts off for this year and a “C” is what I deserved to get? All I could do was sigh. But, in the car I cried and my mommy told me it was alright. I kept on telling her, it’s not and it will NEVER be for me. I’m a straight A’s student and it’s very depressing to see that kinda grade in my report. Not as I expected. Expect the unexpected. You name it, I was flaming mad, sad, disappointed and stuff all emotions together would be equal to me. I felt so unmotivated (and still is till now). I revised so hard, I even made 10 chapters summaries, man! Darn it! I gotta admit though that the exam was very hard, but nevertheless a heartless teacher marked it and that’s where it went downhill and I felt oh yeah something is going to lose. And, yes (of course) it’s me. I got pretty good mark though in Business Studies, because most people failed it. Well, most of them got E’s and F’s down up to U’s. And I know I should be thankful for the jar of lemon juice I have. Not that I’m not thankful. Way hell, I am. It’s just that I’m NOT SATISFIED (red face, angry face, lemony face, chili face you name it). I cried my hearts out on the way home and my bro did not say a word till we got home and said, “Kak, maybe God has a good plan for you.” I stopped watching TV for a while and thought yes, maybe. And I replied, “Well, I hope His plan is not going to make me study more stuff, especially the damn Business, ‘cos if I study more, I might explode my brain cells and I don’t think I will like it to be a ‘vegetable’ person who can’t think. No, thanks seriously.” He just hummed his way upstairs. But, seriously what could be more depressing than my situation right now? I’m going through a tough time now. Well, at least I got B’s in English, B’s in Chemistry and B’s in French which are the grades I would expect. Nearly all my mates were failing it big style, because this year’s exam is so damn hard. Most people got C’s and D’s and some got E’s in English, and in Chemistry, people got F’s and some got E’s (although some also got A’s) and in French, most of them got D’s and E’s. Overall, I’m in a quite good position. But if you ask me, how I did in my exam, I would say I have done my best. But if you ask me a different question, how well was your result. I might stay silent, considering this Business Studies thing. How I hate Business Studies now! Although I used to love it. I just wish my dad won’t question me when I cry later on when I show him my paper and my results. Hope my wishes come true. Pray for me, please bloggers!

Feeling Excited!

Waa, I don’t know. I feel so boozed out. This summer holiday is going to be so special. So exciting and entertaining that I can’t hold it up anymore. I want it to start already for crying out loud! This is the plan.

Me and my family (bro, mom and dad) are planning to go to Dubai. But, this time we’re going to make it all new and adventurous. This past few days we looked out for every opportunity to gather resources of where to spend it; places, amusement parks, restaurants and stuff. And of course they have to be in Dubai, ‘cos I am really dying to go and visit Dubai sometime really really really soon.

And so, me and my bro found out this really cool place. It’s a water park in Dubai (called Wild Wadi, Dubai’s premier water park), near the most famous hotel in there called Burj Al Arab. It’s just next to that hotel. It’s so humongous (and of course, it’s the coolest thing to see & visit for summer, according to me and my bro who loves swimming and playing with water). Anyway, the place is so freaking huge although the entrance tickets are quite costly, but it’s okay ‘cos dad said we can go. So that means there’s enough money in the bank, hehehe…

So, four of us in this gigantic water park just enjoying our days, finally. Wee, can’t wait that long. Still 2 weeks to go and I’m scratching my feet. Bloggers, what are your planning for your summer vacation? Who wants to come with us to Dubai and visit Wild Wadi? Take a look at this and gasp at it!

This is the Jumeirah Sceirah attraction. Experience the exhilaration of weightlessness on the Jumeirah Sceirah, a speed slide that hurtles you at speeds of up to 80 kms per hour! It’s the tallest and fastest free-fall speed slide outside North America, cascading a breathtaking 33 metres.

For more info, visit: www.wildwadi.com!

Being a Teacher for 10 Minutes

Yeah, bloggers. I really have forgotten to tell you how my Chemistry paper went. It was (please, don’t mock on to my teacher) so hard. Hard, hard. And hard.

The funny thing I forgot to post here was that I was being a Chemistry teacher for my whole class for about 10 minutes or so, can be more I presume. This is how it went.

They (the class) did not quite understand something about how to work out moles and molecular mass of the molecules. They (well, first it wasn’t a they, it was rather a she) asked me what’s the equation to work out moles.

I answered, “It’s number of moles equals to the mass given over the molecular mass!” And she nodded, but I can tell by the look on her face, of course she couldn’t well got it. So, she raised her eyebrows and looked at me. Well, more like staring into space, next to me, as if somebody was standing besides me. She glanced at me and said, “Hmm, can you, maybe just maybe, teach me how to do so?” I nearly laughed. Well, I chuckled. I thought she got it by my first explanation.

So then, I came over to her desk and I already got shouted at by my homeroom teacher by the first sound I made with my chair moving closer to her (sigh). I thought she wouldn’t mind if I explain to another student something they might not have understood. But, it was revision time so maybe she did mind. What a teacher.

My friend sighed after my teacher shouted at me. I said sorry to teacher and hoped me apologizing would make her realize I ain’t that bad. Well, not as bad as she thought.

To make long story short, the whole class started to get stuck on this same question. Finally, all of them came up to me and asked me to explain (well, to all of them I guess). And I asked the teacher if I could do so, she said NO. But, with the whole “force” thing going on between her and my friends. She got forced to do so, as the exams time came nearer and nearer for us to face.

All of them asked me to explain it and write all the workings out on the board. And I was allowed by my homeroom teacher (finally) to do so.

The funny thing was one student shouted loud, “She must be our Chemistry teacher! We must recruit her!” Hahaha, that made me nervous yet shocking. I really hate it to be a teacher, especially (oh please, God no!) a science teacher. Better be a Maths teacher or something…

But, it wasn’t horrible after all, not that bad at least. They got what I meant, and I sat down. And everybody applauded for me as I took my seat again. My friends shouted thanks in the background and have made my day. Although, I still think (and still do, actually) wouldn’t want to be one of the naughtiest class’ teacher, especially Chemistry! What a day, what a day! It was so fun, too actually. Thanks to all who shouted, “Geek!” or “Nerd!” across the room. On the other side, hey they trusted me to explain something to them, and finally they got it. They are not dumb, simply lazy that’s all. Thanks for your appreciation, mates! Love you all! *Big smile, warm hug!* Anyone want to share their experience of (once) being a teacher? Drop your comment my way!

This year’s Olympics on 2008 is going to be held in Beijing. In this post, I ain’t going to talk much, just bored. So, you can take a peek on some arenas they are going to compete in. Maybe, cool stadiums, too! And of course, their mascots! (Sorry for posting lots of posts today, I simply am bored to heck!)

Okay, enough chit chat. Here it goes!

Cute mascots! I want one of the dolls!

Their swimming stadium! Aww aww aww, I wish I can be one of the athletes visiting this thing over here!

Or this! Take a look!

Or this one?

Visit this one, too!

And this!

Wew, take a look at this one!

And finally… The opening!

Any comments, anyone?

Biology = Boredom

Bloggers, don’t tell me you don’t agree with me with my statement! It’s so true! Tomorrow, I still have my exams. Well, at least now I only have a week left of exams to do, with a bunch to do and so little time for revision. I hate revising, I hate revising, I hate it! It’s so boring. Especially for this one subject I always find it boring. It’s not difficult or anything, just PLAIN boring. Some stuff in it are DEFINITELY not interesting. Biology can find itself in somebody’s mind, but not mine! Hahahaha…

Since yesterday, had I been busy studying and preparing for tomorrow’s Biology paper. I have made a revision thing, consists of 10 or so A4 papers, and now I knew half of them (pretty much) by heart. Seriously, who enjoys Biology? For some of you who do, I think you better learn Physics, because Physics is so much more interesting to study.

Today, my mom and dad asked me if I wanted to go with them to buy bakso in somebody-whom-I-don’t-know-and-don’t-bother-knowing’s house. So, I stayed home. Alone. Studying. My MSN is on, but I rarely talked to people. Just plain studying, no playing (might be my first time, by the way). Hahahaha… After that, I wanted to lie down for a while, trying to catch some sleep (which I failed doing) and went back to studying. So yeah, pray for me so I can do good for tomorrow’s Biology-the-most-boring-est-est-est subject! I hope I don’t fall asleep by the end of the exam (which I might). I would rather do three Physics or Maths paper (which I love doing) rather than this. Oh, gosh! How I wish I can end this exam threats! People, share with me your boredom during Biology lessons, too! Keep me awake, yo!

Freaky Friday!

Duh bloggers, kemarin itu hari Jumat yg sangat amat melelahkan. Bayangin aja, aku bangun pagi to start with. Which is biasanya, aku ngga lakukan. Lalu, aku nyiapin lagu buat sorenya main keyboard. Terus, belajar belajar belajar, makan siang eh udah jam 1an. Jadi cuma keburu tidur jam 1 lebih sampe jam 3an. Terus, jam 3 mandi, jam 4 pergi gereja sampe jam 7an kurang. Habis itu, papa masih rapat lama. Jadi, adek sama papa ngga ikut kita makan di luar. Mereka stay di hotel aja; papa rapat, adek main. Mama sama aku sama keluarganya Cilla, makan di Resto Minang. Di jalan mau ke sana, aku di kritik habis-habisan soal kebaktian tadi tentang team musiknya. Yah yang kaya gini lah gitu lah, yah biasalah orang tua. Aku sampe nangis tau ngga sih. Secara mama ga pikir-pikir apa itu akan menyakitiku apa ngga, tapi aku tau yang penting aku udah memberikan yang terbaik yang aku bisa. Tapi, yasudahlah akhirnyapun kita makan, dapet parkir. Selesai dari situ, kita ke Center Point, nunggu papa selesai rapat, selagi liat-liat sale. Baby Shop, Shoe Mart, Splash, and City Lifestyle lagi summer sale. Yaudah deh kita ngumpul ngeliat-ngeliat aja, toh aku lagi ngga mood beli apa-apa. Mana tokonya penuh banget lagi ya, jadi ngga semangat, akupun ngga beli apa-apa. Aku malah ke toilet terus ngga lama Cilla sama aku dah nongkrong di Costa Coffee. Cuma beli satu sandwich, sama dua Double Chocolate Frescato. Ya lumayan sih, bisa ada yang dimakan gitu. Kita cerita-cerita sambil nunggu ortu belanja, secara dia sama aku dah cape jalan-jalan mulu sedangkan mata dah ngga bersahabat, alias ngantuk. Jadi, kita ngobrol-ngobrol ringan aja. Makasih ya Cilla, dah ngubah moodku. Yang tadinya aku bener-bener ngga mood untuk ngapa-ngapain, habis insiden nangis itu, aku bisa ngobrol bareng sama kamu. Habis nunggu papa di Costa Coffee, kita balik lagi ke Le Park Hotel. Itupun masih nunggu beberapa menit, mungkin setengah jam’an kali ya, karena papa belum kunjung datang. Kita nunggu di mobil aja, habisnya boring juga kalo keluar, ngapain gitu ya. Yaudah habis dari situ, jemput papa sama adek, they got on the car and we rode home. Yah terhitung ini Jumat yang teraneh yang pernah aku lalui. Aku bisa nangis karena mama, terus ketawa bercanda sama Cilla, merasa boring saat nunggu papa di mobil. Ngga apa-apa lah ya, namanya juga pengalaman, enak ngga enak perlu dilewati!